A Blog About Punching People In the Face

At a bar in South America

In Thoughts by Tyson on June 8, 2012 at 10:31 am

It is lonely, being the only one in the bar, though I suppose that this condition is to be expected when one hits the bars at 1 o’clock in the afternoon. I am in an Irish bar in South America and, having ordered a Guinness, I learn that such libations are only available in cans — not a sin, in and of itself (one cannot be too orthodox in South America).

My bartender is surly and views me with suspicion. The bar has imported the same noxious playlist that blares from many a fake Irish bar around the world. Also, the complimentary popcorn is stale and may have given me herpes.

What is worse, though I began this day flush with purpose, I have since lost steam, likely a result of the six glasses of wine and wholly unsatisfactory (and largely unconsumed) lunch.

This is easily the most depressing bar I have been to. Also, my Guinness smells like fish. I am sad.

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